In Italy it is totally different, we have sex first.
Tonight is one of those nights, and soon Leah will head to Jim’s penthouse apartment, where the rest of the evening, she says, will probably entail “hanging out, watching something, having sex.” “She’ll usually spend the night,” Ryan adds nonchalantly, which gives him a chance to enjoy some time alone or even invite another woman over.
He doesn’t have a long-standing secondary relationship like Leah (“I’ve actually veered away from doing that”), but he certainly enjoys the company of other women, even sometimes when Leah is home.
“I like everyone to meet each other and be friends and stuff,” he explains.
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By the end of their dinner at a small Italian restaurant in New York’s West Village, Leah is getting antsy to part ways with her boyfriend Ryan, so that she can go meet up with her boyfriend Jim.
It’s not that she means to be rude, it’s just that Jim has been traveling for work, so it’s been a while since she’s seen him. As her “primary partner” and the man with whom she lives, he is the recipient of most of Leah’s attention, sexual and otherwise, but he understands her need to seek companionship from other quarters roughly one night a week.
Ilaria Perrone, sex columnist for Grazia.it, the go-to magazine for the "It" girls of Milan, has given up on dating. But if you want to see him again, you have to wait. I know in New York you do the other things first, then sex after, but here we think blow jobs are more private than sex.
“Italian men are romantic but they are also liars,” she told New York sex columnist Maureen O’Connor in the latest entry in Italy in 30 Days’ Exchange Rates conversation series. " And don't even get her started on the shortage of cunnilingus slang. It can be very difficult, because in Italy men date because they want to have sex. If you go with a boy in Milan, you know 90 percent of the time, you will be with him that night. I used to talk with friends who lived in USA, and they tell me, “We go on real dates. You can have sex with a condom on a first date, but oral sex is more complicated. When you live with your parents, when you live with the Pope and the church, it’s difficult to change your mind so quickly. In this country, men can do whatever they want because they are men, they are like this, they need sex, they need affairs. K., girls use Tinder, so here in Milan they get dates with Italian men that way.
Skyping from Milan, Perrone explained the hazards of dick-centric dating and swearing. I meet him on Tinder and we go out to dinner.” And the men would say, “The American girls are so free! If those women never give oral sex, do they still receive it? But it doesn’t have its own word, I think because it’s taboo. I think there are two kinds of men, one that thinks this is not macho and doesn't like it, and one that really likes it. Italy had protest and revolutions in the ‘60s, just as they did in the USA and U. Particularly in the south, you would hear people say about Berlusconi, “He had a lot of women and that’s good! I have friends who tell me it’s not so easy to get Italian girls to go on dates with Tinder; they have to be pushed.
It’s easy to take them home and have sex with them, but with you Italian girls, it’s not so easy.” At least, that’s what they say; I don’t know if it’s real. They treat you like a princess, and the next day they disappear. You know, I was discussing this during dinner with a friend of mine recently. We also have different words for men and women masturbating each other. If you use your hand on a man, it's sega, which is also the thing you do when you cut a tree, saw. Men who have a lot of women are real men.”The opposite. A lot of women become obsessed with finding marriage. But American girls are easier because they are here on holiday.